Experiment #247

Villainous Classifieds

Nemesis Wanted
BG seeking GG for Nemesis-ian relationship. Must have respectable skills and abilities. Genetic mutations need not apply. Mystical powers preferred.

Has the public turned on you?
Dr. Fallacy & Associates, attorneys-at-law, would like to help. We’ve represented hundreds of misunderstood villains in thousands of cases. Just because he’s a “GG” doesn’t mean he’s above the law. Know your rights. Call the experienced law firm. We’re here to help.

Seeking Evil Compatriot
The Villainous V seeks fifth member to make name appropriate again. Must be able to read Roman Numerals and create inventive alliterative speeches involving Vs

Minion sitter wanted
Looking for minion sitter to watch minions while I’m out conquering the world and/or imprisoned when said conquering fails. Contact Jerry for details and a test run.

BG Seeking Villainess
Handsome well dressed villain with excellent hair seeks female villain for fun and shared heists. Candidates with more than one nemesis need not apply (looking for fun, not baggage)

Dr. Awful’s World Domination Plans
Are your plans missing that spark or are your brains no match for your brute strength? Dr. Awful’s World Domination plans will help you take your villainy to the next level. No thought or planning needed, just sit back, follow the plan and dominate the world!

End of the World Party
Come celebrate the end of the world party in Dr. Dimwit’s dungeon of doom. Please bring a dessert item and your most impressionable minions. Weapons, lock picks, and anything that might free you from a hypothetical dungeon cell are not allowed. We’ll have all the casserole you can eat in a dungeon.

BG seeking Senior Henchman/Henchwoman
Mr. Despicable seeks top lieutenant for carrying out evil schemes and torturing his nemesis. You’ll have a hundred minions at your command, plus World Domination insurance and a state of the art dental plan. Apply now!

Rube Devices Unlimited
Need that perfect device for polishing off your hero? Want to make him/her suffer while each intricate cause and effect brings him/her closer to their inevitable end? Sign up for our contraption of the month club and save!

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Peer Review the Experiment

Tell the author how he did and how he could do better.
Be Honest. Be Specific. Be Constructive.