Even before it came into view, she could hear it tinkling in the distance. Little bits of metal rubbing against each other like a wind chime on steroids.
Next came the plodding clip-clops of the old cart horse. That old horse would have lost to a snail in a race, but he could trudge on through the worst blizzard or cross the deepest river. Steady as he goes.
Then came the creak of the wheels singing like … Read More
Dinner didn’t agree with him… about being eaten
The Kraken fried the chefs like calamari. Comeuppance.
“Who do you think you are?”
“Your Mom.”
The goat surrendered herself, ending the Cheese War
Hacker tried to steal own identity, but failed.
“Moron!”
“Well, the same to you, Captain Obvious”
“Whaddja name your puppy?” Simon asked.
“Ummm… Simon…”
Little by little the cancer ate her away.
“That’s ok, Alien Overlord. No one liked Florida.”
“I got this,” Dad said before the disaster.
“You sure this is safe?”
Zzzzzzap!
“I was.”
Gadzooks bent and … Read More
Margana aimed her wand. “Morpho Formo!” She yelled. Nothing happened.
The monster lurched toward her with a glint in its eye. It knew its dinner was close at hand. Slobber splattered on the floor.
“Morpho Formo!” she tried again.
The monster roared with horrid laughter. “Your mentor failed you, or rather you’re failing her.”
Margana trembled.
The monster licked its hairy lips. It picked up a chair and tossed it in its gaping jaws. “You call yourself a sorceress. You’ve got … Read More
*kiss*
I love you!
I love you!
That’s okay. I know where your heart is.
No big deal, I mean it’s fine.
Look, I’m sorry about the whole thing. I just wanted to try something new. To draw us closer together.
*silence*
That goes triple for me!
I can’t stand you or your mother.
You’re so full of yourself.
At least I’m trying to make a difference.
New things are fine, your crazy desire to re-engineer human interaction, that’s the problem.
Me? You’re the one who can’t … Read More
Chad danced through history class, tapped his feet through science, and snapped his fingers through math. “Weird” was the kindest of a long list of adjectives his classmates used. His teachers learned to ignore him.
This is often the place in the story where a kindhearted teacher or awkward kindred spirit comes in and finds the music in his soul. But that didn’t happen to Chad. He lived in your town and you did nothing.
The evil Dr. Slymee, creator of the première genetically mutated army of super slugs, (near) World Conqueror, and inventor of Slymeez hair gel seeks qualified hero to battle on regular occasions as nemesis. (His original nemesis is no longer available due to contract disputes and other legal issues).
Requirements:
Loves children and puppies and will be heartbroken if an evil villain attempted to slime them.
Seeks good and the betterment of mankind. Places that above his/her own desires/personal … Read More
Tim slammed the console with his fist. The robot’s LED eyes flickered and dimmed.
“Stupid, bot!” Tim shouted, “you were supposed to get us home.” Lorna put her hand on Tim’s shoulder. They alone had survived in the lifeboat. An accident they could only thank Tim’s misguided attempt to get Lorna alone for. The decompression happened too quick for anyone else to reach another lifeboat.
Lorna had done what she could to boost the lifeboat’s systems, but … Read More
I went to log into my blog today, and after the typical username and password, it asked me a final question: to prove my humanity.
My mind reeled with the possibilities: my love for my children, my wife and I’s first kiss, the tears at my father’s funeral, the sandwich I bought the homeless man down the street, the money I send to poor children in a country I’ve never been to who speak a language … Read More
A teaspoon. Just a teaspoon of Their “spice.” Something from Their home world that might cure him. They said it was safe. They said it would stop the visions. They said it would stop the pain.
First his hands curled and twisted into a shadow of their former selves. The man who had painted heavenly scenes, futuristic cities and serene space-scapes was reduced to a Jackson Pollock, throwing paint at a canvas. His feet and legs … Read More
Late one evening a red beast invaded our dwelling’s exhaust port, extinguishing our heat source. Bulging, red and grotesque, I had never seen such horrors even in the holographic pictures. Not wanting to draw the ire of the beast, I concealed myself in the lavatory and watched it’s progress.
It stood in the room scratching its top fur and muttering about the lack of both socks and a bedecked conifer. Finally, it tossed boxes on … Read More
The purple tree with purple leaves exploded in a shower of shards and splinters. Samuel holstered his plasma rifle and smirked.
“Yeh shouldn’t aggravate the trees, young-un,” said Shamus. His tone was more warning than disapproval. “Ah, stuff it, Shamus, I do what I want,” Samuel said.
“Have it your way, lad.” Shamus checked his pack to make sure the Gruuntheld was safe then hoisted it to his shoulder.
This planet had more of the substance than they knew what to … Read More
That was all the ransom message said. It came in on every radio station, newspaper, television channel and internet site. People were listening or watching or surfing and then boom they heard or saw or read “We now have Polaris.” No list of demands or reasons or anything. To make matters worse telescopes and infrared detectors could only see a dark spot where Polaris once shined so brightly.
People had kidnapped big things before: a … Read More
Kari flung herself onto the sofa. She had just enough time to enjoy the softness of the cushion before she felt the impact. Sonia, a three-year-old whirlwind, had vaulted over the sofa and landed on her mother’s back.
Kari resisted the urge to play dead and turned over to finish the tickle fight Sonia had started upon landing. Sonia devolved into a bucket of giggles and Kari raised her hands in victory.
*
When Kari’s eyes refocused Sonia was … Read More
Sarah looked at her brother, Chris, then jumped. She appeared out of thin air three hundred miles away in her apartment. She stepped to the book shelf, disabled the booby-trap and pulled out a book. It had been hollowed out to hold a long cylinder, an infinium disc. Clutching it she stepped back and jumped again. She appeared a few feet from Chris just out of range of the dampening field.
“No,” Chris said. “You can’t.” His … Read More
Grin and bear it
One day, instead of going for a run, Steve sat down in his easy chair with a bowl of popcorn and a case of soda. He turned on the nature channel and watched people hike through the rolling hills and gentle slopes of his native country. Suddenly a bear came in the front door. While Steve cowered in the kitchen, the bear tore apart his living room and ravaged his easy chair.
Moral: … Read More
