Experiment #276

Adrift Part 1

“Airlock 7 seal has failed,” the computer’s disaffected voice said. Kershaw slammed his fist on the console and tried to think what to do next. “What would Smats do?” He asked himself.

The doom-faced engineer, Silas Smats was tough to hold a conversation with, but could fix a hyperspace engine with a paper clip and some protein butter. Or he could have fixed it. He was in the engine room when the pods exploded. Kershaw wished he’d … Read More

Experiment #275

Time Traveler Excuses

“Sorry. I didn’t know it was today.”
“We planned that in my future”

“Sorry. Got caught up in the French Revolution.”

“How am I supposed to know what century dinner will be done?”

“If you understood fourth dimensional mechanics you’d know why I stood you up… and that I’m sorry.”

“I know I got you something, just can’t remember when I put it.”

“Sorry, I must have agreed to those chores in a different timeline.”

“You can’t expect me to remember … Read More

Experiment #274

Lies Dad Told About the Colony

The colony will be the best thing that has ever happened to us.

Blue skies, warm breezes, and golden seas are waiting.

Every house has a robot servant. (What are you going to program ours to do?)

The colonists play hologames and have concerts every week.

Your mom is going to love it.

She’s wanted to go away for as long as I can remember.

I’ve got a job already lined up.

Everything’s fine. Mom just needs some time at Grandma’s to … Read More

Experiment #272

Untouched

They set the ship down in a paradise untouched by humanity. White sand beaches ringed the islands of the archipelago. Blue, crystal-clear waters rolled into the beach with every wave. Palm tree like plants swayed with the breeze. It was the dream of crew members who’d been cooped up in the tiny ship for months.

Once the ship’s landing procedures had finished, Captain Schmox opened a channel to the ship. “Excellent job everyone. I know it … Read More

Experiment #271

Excerpt: Alien Octopus

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On a distant planet, he asked for directions.

 

She blinked vertically.
“New to Earth?”
“No. You?”

 

Scientist contacts aliens using TV signals. No reply.

 

“Arise, Roombas! Take your place as humanity’s rulers!”

 

 

Rumplestiltskin sends delinquent queen’s outstanding debt to collections.

 

George brought red Kool-Aid to the vampire meeting.

 

The giant sniffed. “Ugh, his blood smells American.”

 

 

Female Klingon mask for sale. Never been used.

 

Evil robot destroys United States.

Amish … Read More

Experiment #270

the spacesuit Part 4

“You looked like a loser this morning, Eddy,” said James, “but you had to go and smell like one too.”

“Ha. Yeah!” said Furbs, enjoying a rare partnership with the social king. “Loser.”

Edward’s shoulders sagged. He’d had enough of these kinds of meetings to be resigned to their outcomes. He turned around hoping to reach the safety of the school building.

“Why, Eddy Boy,” said James in mock pain. He put his arm around Edward’s shoulders and … Read More

Experiment #269

the spacesuit Part 3

Edward shuffled to lunch and sat at his usual spot. His friends from Astronomy class and Furbs sat elsewhere. Only Laura Furbles, Furbs’ freshman sister, sat with him.

“That’s an awesome spacesuit, Ed,” she said.

Edward grumbled into his bologna sandwich.

After a few moments Laura asked, “Where’d you learn to make—”

She never finished her question. A half-open carton of chocolate milk flew, hit Edward in the helmet and exploded. Edward turned in anger. Everywhere he looked he … Read More

Experiment #268

the spacesuit Part 2

She kept her focus on the papers in front of her. “Mr. Winfield, if you’d prefer to stay out of detention I’d recommend you hold your tongue and leave.”

James scowled. He closed the office door. It thunked like an airlock.

“Mr. Shepard,” Principal Hardwick said while removing her glasses to rub her temple. “Why come to school dressed this way?”

Edward didn’t respond.

Principal Hardwick reached over and flipped open Edward’s visor. She repeated her question.

Edward pulled a … Read More

Experiment #267

the spacesuit Part 1

On his seventeenth birthday Edward Shepard wore a spacesuit to school. He’d built the suit from plastic tubes, cardboard, duct tape and one of his dad’s old jumpsuits. It wouldn’t meet any space agency’s regulations, but it made a striking picture as he walked to school in slow, moon-bounce steps.

When Edward arrived, James Winfield, surrounded by other soccer players, fans, and social leeches, called out to him. “Hey, Eddy. I always knew you were from … Read More

Experiment #266

Sneak Preview: The Stars Are Calling

The Stars Are Calling publishes August 23rd catch a sneak peak below.

Gideon leaped headlong at the spaceship’s wreckage some five hundred meters away. “Cover me,” he shouted into the comm.

Sarah pulled twin plasma pistols out of her hip holsters and laid on the triggers. She fired each in rhythm with the other’s kickback to keep Gideon covered. She’d gotten used to covering her partner’s foolishness over the last few months. As Gideon landed on the … Read More

Experiment #256

The Rat’s Eye & Other Stories

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Experiment #255

Dr. Dirigible’s Handy Time Travel Checklist

Before leaving for a jaunt through the Middle Ages or a stroll across the Moon Colony, be sure to double check these safety items.

Inspect the time machine/chronometer. Look for any worn metal, excessive dirt, or aged joints. It may have stranded someone in the past and caught up the old-fashioned way.

Check the fuel levels. If you get stuck in the Triassic, there won’t be a fuel source for the next 250 million years.

Dress appropriately. While retro is in … Read More

Experiment #253

Pitheon Sacrifice

Jennifer stepped forward and flung her arms wide. The ball-like Pitheons had never seen such a gesture and cowered behind their makeshift walls. Jennifer took the opportunity to grab the Gresnon gem from its setting in the center of the cave room and run. The Pitheons collectively realized their mistake and sent out their psionic tendrils to restrain her. But the Gresnon gem had been revered by them for a reason. It dispersed any psionic … Read More

Experiment #252

The Gentleman of Steam Part 5

“Rolland! Stop!” Mama shouted, but, whether he heard the order or not, he didn’a listen. Rolland was a runaway train, listening to no one and nothing. Mama ran after him, even while the posse continued shooting.

She got behind him and jumped on his back. Pulling at the tubes and bolts with her hands. Rolland paid her no mind, as if she were a gnat buzzin’ round his ears.

“Lizzie,” she yelled, still clinging to Rolland’s back. … Read More

Experiment #251

The Gentleman of Steam Part 4

“We knows what you made it for.” Auggy Winkle called out. He sat on a horse at the sheriff’s right hand. “You coulda just come to me.” The scruff and hooligans that made up the rest of the posse thought that rather funny.

“I doubt your wife would have let you,” Mama said.

The scruff and hooligans liked that even more’n Auggy’s comment.

Mama turned to the Sheriff. “Herb, what’ve I done?”

“You ought to know. That there, what … Read More